None. Not one. I really do hate to burst your bubble and be a killjoy but, there are no good single men. Now there are good men. There are even simgle men. But there are no good single men. If you find a good single man, chances are his wife just died in a horrible plane crash. And if that is the case, you better be at the funeral and repast with a bucket of chicken because chances are there will be 15 other women there waiting to take her place. Why? Because there are no good single men. Truth is, you are going to have to take one from another chick. You are going to have to fight to get him and fight even harder to keep him because somebody else is reading this and coming to grips with the fact there are no good single men. You gotta take one, despite what Steve Harvey and Tyrese tell you. I know you don’t like to hear that because it probably goes against all you have been taught or your faith. If you have grown up in or frequented church, pastors tell you to wait for your “Boaz” meanwhile you ain’t getting “No-Ass” because it seems he never comes. You’ve been told that in Proverbs it says “The man who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor in the Lord.” Now touch ya neighbor and say “NEIGHBOOOORRRRR!” Meanwhile it seems like all the hoes you know are getting wifed up. (see Blac Chyna…excuse me, Angela Kardashian) Even this chick just got married last month

Seriously, what pastors don’t tell you is that Proverbs is a book of wisdom passed down from a father to a son (it actually says that at the beginning of Proverbs, but most haven’t read it so…) . I am sure if it were a book of wisdom passed down from a mother to a daughter, that verse would read totally different. Or maybe not. Also it was written in a different time and era. Women could be stoned for premarital sex. Imagine if we still lived like that. You wouldn’t be reading this right now because YOU would be dead. Yeah I did just assume that you aren’t a virgin. Am I wrong? Thought so…

Back to the lecture at hand…

I can’t tell you the amount of times that I am asked by friends, “TK, where are all the good single men?” And I always reply “They are at home with their woman.” Truth is, most of the guys that you want are taken. It’s real. And truthfully, you don’t want a single man anyway. Why would you want someone that no one else wants? Men are like shoes. Good ones are like Jordan’s. People want them. They wake up early and stand in line for them. And on most occasions they sell out quickly. Why? Because people want them. Meanwhile there are some perfectly nice and comfortable all white reeboks on the shelf.

(Seriously, do YOU want these?)

These are always in stock. They always have your size. And they are always $30. Why? Don’t nobody want those? Good men are like J’s. Single men are like these plain white reeboks. Bad example? Still not getting it? Ok. Here is another…

Before Columbus and the Pilgrims came and settled America, there were people already here. And those people were living and enjoying life. Then came the settlers. And before you know it, America is our land and the natives were displaced. Settlers came and took that shit over. America is like a good man. Now I am not saying you should give another woman small pox…or maybe I am. You want a good man right? Well roll those sleeves up, and slap on that spanx and go out there and get you somebody else’s man. Your future depends on it. And for those that say “Why I gotta do all that” and “I don’t want nobody else’s man”, to you I say enjoy your cats and all white reeboks while all your friends are rocking the new J’s.

This will be YOU if you don’t heed my advice

*disclaimer: This is not for married men…or maybe it is…*

TK